Thursday, May 1, 2008

becoming a man

There is a paper from a fortune cookie on my desk and it reads
Don't forget to do good deeds as you accumulate wealth.

In my mind's eye there is another one right next to it and that one reads
You are an idiot!

So what does is it going to take God, before I can get to wherever it is you are demanding I be? How much do I have to be able to withstand? How much power do I need to be able to wield over obstacles and enemies? How much, how fast do I have to think, run, find truth, expel rumors, kill evil?


On the outside, I am not happy. But on the inside, I have to wonder what the heck you are doing.

Will my life mean something in exchange?

If I keep running... and then I run even harder, will I someday see the smile on your face? Will I see the smile on my own?

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